Tuesday, January 15, 2013

VP now mad enough to lead


Recent statements by the Vice President that the President was anointed by God at age 10 to lead the country show that she has now gained the level of lunacy required to lead the party, political analysts have said.

After previous statements denouncing important party principles - such as violence and corruption - people within the party had begun to wonder whether she was the right person to lead. But she has now removed all doubt by demonstrating her ability to say some really silly dumb shit.

“People are wasting their time by opposing President Mugabe. It was prophesied way back in 1934, when he was only 10 years old, that he was going to lead this country. How can a normal person challenge such a leader?” the VP was quoted as saying while speaking to a bunch of Mapostoris.

Her clownish remarks were welcomed by members of her faction.

"Talking out of your ass and acting like a lunatic is a major requirement if you want to rise to senior leadership," a senior official said, before he himself began talking loads of laughable bullshit in a desperate bid to promote himself as a potential leader.