Wednesday, May 22, 2013

PM: I'm not living large - yet.


The PM's pathetic little shack in Highlands

The Prime Minister has denied he is “living large”, saying he would only do that when he becomes President.

The PM told the press that it was not true he was living in luxury. He has a mansion in Highlands, goes on cruise ships on the South Pacific with skin-lightening cream models, and is driven around in a Mercedes-Benz S350. But he says this isn’t living large at all.
This is just rehearsal.
“I am not living large at all," he told reporters at his humble Highlands home. "For that, please wait till I’m president. Then I will no longer go on cruise ships; I will actually own a fucking cruise ship.”

He complained that the house he was living in was valued at just under a million dollars. “Who wants to live in such a shack?” he grumbled, as his wife Sleazy Lizzy nodded at her chubby hubby, saying her husband was only practising being president, with the little that he has.

The PM said: “You call this ‘living large’? You see this shack I’m living in? I’ll have bigger and more of these. This rusty, three-year-old Benz? I’ll have newer and more. This light-skinned wife? I’ll have ...” At which point Lizzy stopped nodding.